When growing up I loved being around my grandma and grandpa, I especially loved being at their house. They only live about a ten-minute drive from me, so I saw them quite often. When at their house I always had the best time. Surrounded by my immediate family, along with nine cousins, eight aunts and uncles, and my grandparents it was hard not to have a good time. My grandparents loved their grandchildren a lot. They would have candy jars, a while drawer full of candy for back up, a cookie jar, a freezer stocked with ice cream and freezies, a fridge full of our favorite pop, and they even had a room designated for us grandchildren. The room was called the “play room,” this was where the kids could go to watch TV, hang out, and get away from the adults. My grandparent’s house was one if my favorite places to be.
On the morning of September 7, 2008 I woke up in my grandparents spare bedroom in the upstairs of their home. I went downstairs for breakfast, but I was surprisingly greeted with a tightly held hug from my great aunt. She asked how I was doing and if everything was all right. When I was questioned I became very confused on why I was being asked. I responded yes, and that I was okay. I slowly walked into the living room to check on my grandmother, who had been in there for the past few days on her deathbed.
I looked around the living room only to find nothing. The living room was put back to its original state, and my grandmother was gone. I thought about how important my grandmother was to our family. My grandma was the person who kept the whole family together and going strong. She supported and loved everyone no matter what. My grandma would be at all the sporting events whether it was hockey, basketball, baseball, or soccer. She was a devoted fan and loved cheering on her grandchildren and even her own children. But my grandmother was gone now, and the pieces all started to come together. My grandmother who I love so dearly was gone just like that. All I could think was how could she be gone? I was with her just last night, I did not even get to say goodbye. I knew she was very sick, but I never thought that she would actually pass away. She was my grandma and she was always there for me, she can’t be gone. Later that day I was informed that after I had went to bed, a little after midnight my grandmother passed away from fighting her courageous battle with cancer.
Nearly thirteen months later on October 19, 2009 I came home from school to find my mother full of tears, I knew from just one look that something was terribly wrong. My mother explained to me that my grandfather was admitted into the hospital and he would not make it through the rest of the day. I immediately wanted to be right by his side. When I arrived at the hospital everyone was surrounding him in his bed including his children, in-laws, grandchildren, and his best friends. The only person missing was my aunt Annette, which would be my grandfather’s youngest child. Annette was on a on a business trip and soon hopped on the next flight back to Minneapolis. While waiting for my aunt to arrive I was given the chance to hold my grandpa’s hand, I was a little skeptical at first, but I knew I would regret it if I did not. I sat at his bedside, slightly holding onto his hand because I did not want to hurt him. His hand was so cold and dry, and it somewhat made me uncomfortable. While holding his hand it made me think back to all my memories with my grandpa. My grandpa was more of a quiet person who liked to keep to himself. He may not have shown much emotion, but I know deep down he cared about all of us. At times he was also very humorous. Whenever my dad would leave the room my grandpa would make a joke about him, which I always thought was funny. Those were some of my favorite moments with my grandpa. I heard a nonstop beeping noise, and it made me flash back to reality. All of a sudden I realized there were a lot of beeping and blinking machines. There was one machine in particular that really caught my eye, his heart rate. I noticed that it was continuing to drop ever so slowly. All I did was pray that my grandfather would hang in there until my aunt arrived. About three hours had past since I first arrived that my aunt had gotten there.
After another couple of hours my mother brought my brother and I home because it was a school night. Before I left I said my goodbye to my grandfather, and that was one of the hardest things I had ever had to do. I knew I would regret it if I did not because I learned that the hard way from the passing of my grandmother. I went home hoping that I would get to see my grandfather live another day, but unfortunately about a half hour after we left my grandfather passed away from pneumonia.
With both of my grandparents now deceased it was a huge change not only I would have to overcome, but my whole family as well. The simplest things our family would do together were never going to be the same. The biggest change we had to get use to is not having them apart of our family gatherings anymore, and those were a big part of our family traditions. We would have a get together for everything, including Halloween. After talking with my aunt Michelle, my grandparents fourth child out of the six, agreed that family gatherings were one of the hardest parts since their passing. She also expressed “The core of our family was now gone, and we must rely on one another for support.” However, since the passing of my grandparent we have two new additions to the family, one grandchild and one great grandchild. My aunt stated, “This has helped distracted all of us a little bit from grieving our losses and be happy about the new lives in our family.”
Two years have gone by since my grandmother has passed and it has not been quite a year yet for my grandfather, but for some reason it feels like they never left. It feels like their spirits are still so much alive, which in some ways they still are. Before my grandmother passed she said she wanted to be reincarnated into a butterfly, every time I see one I say “Hello” because I believe it is her checking in on me. My grandfather on the other hand was cremated; at my cabin we spread some of his ashes because that was one of his favorite places to be. Whenever I am at the cabin it feels like he is sitting right there with us. These are the two biggest things that have helped me overcome my grandparent’s deaths, as I am sure it has helped my family members as well. From this experience I have learned if you have family you should appreciate them because some people do not have any all and one day they will not be there. To me family is one of the most important things in life.
